Teenage Conundrum

Feels like a lifetime has passed by since I last blogged. And I feel absolutely guilty that I have not been an active blogger. But so much has happened over the past few months that looking back on it, it really feels surreal(unbelievable in the nightmarish way...not to forget, nightmares are dreams too) . Its like looking at a far off and distant part of me. All those competitive exams, 12th board exam results, counselling, indecision, contemplation and here I am now doing Engineering. To be honest I still have not let that fact sink in completely into my system. What I think is so ridiculous about the whole thing is that you are just seventeen or eighteen year old's and just about yet starting to learn the realities of life.Despite that, you are expected to know what you want to do professionally for what could probably be the rest of your life. I mean sure there are those who are sure about it and I respect people like that wholeheartedly. But the truth is most of us are livin

                                   What does it take to be Happy? What is your take on it? Is mine any different from yours? Or others’? Or everyone elses’? What is Happiness? Is it money? Is it fame? Is it love? Is it revenge? Is it a memory? Is it a grail? Is it within you? Is it without you? Is happiness a destination? Or is it one of the two paths which flank it? Or is it the path leading to the destination? Where do you find happiness? In the brightness of the rising sun? Or, the serenity of the reflecting moon?                      In the chirping of colorful  birds? Or, the rustling of green leaves? In the stark clouded sky? Or, the heavy pouring rain? In your favorite movie or song? Or, your favorite actor or singer? In the innocent smiles? Or, high pitched laughters? In your loving family? Or, your unconditional  friends? In the exotic restaurant food? Or, the mom-made home special? In your endearing hobby?

Sitting on a chair by her desk, Jenny didn’t know what she felt… Was it fear, anticipation or confusion? You could say it was nothing, She was just numb. Tired of thinking and rethinking all the same old things. All that she wanted is to be distracted from her thoughts… Her mind…her- self…. Self  - who is Jenny? Had Jenny lost herself in a world so big? Will we never find Jenny’s self? Or had Jenny just evolved playing her small part in a larger scene? Had Jenny undergone a change inevitable? Is it good? Is it bad? If only you knew… Would you let her know..oh..oh! Standing there as the scintillating rays of light met the horizon, Jeanne knew what she felt. She could put it in verses So pristine, exquisite yet naïve. You could say it’s nothing, She was just lively. Never tired of seeing or re-veiwing All the same little things which made life purposeful. All she wanted was to let her thoughts flow…be in her mind

                            Today is one of those really cold winter evenings in Bangalore. I sauntered across my balcony and gazed at the lawn. It looked more alive and beautiful due to the drops of rainwater on the leaves and petals forming patterns that brought a smile on my face. I stood leaning onto the railings of the steps leading to our house downstairs. A few yards away, in the site behind our house, at my eye level was a lone, lush green tree flanked by a tarless road (which added to the originality of the naturistic scenario). The rain had taken a hiatus. The cool air swished past me in a slow and tantalising manner ; rustling the leaves of the tree I was constantly staring at (for some reason I couldn’t take my eyes off it). A few children all clad in warm outfits walked along the roadside in groups chattering and laughing to their hearts content. The sight instigated a maelstrom of feelings inside me. It was like seeing through the ‘window of life’. We all live in

                         Another day has gone,I wasted it all again Oblivious to the fact that the unforgiving minute waits for none – once gone, never returns. I look around and see people striving for what they want , despite their insecurities… That’s when I ask myself – “What do I really want?” A hundred sounds fill my head, The echoes grow louder than ever, to reach a pitch where every sound Is unnaturally amplified. I would say déjà vu but, I reckon a little difference Doesn’t really matter…so, Am thinking it over again, Am saying it over again, Over and over again. But I swear this time, It ’ll be a little different,yeah! It ’ll be different… All over again!!! It wasn’t long before I realsied, I am travelling through a maze- whose challenge is to find MY WAY through it; making the CHOICES which Can make or break my survival. Is this what it’s all about – SURVIVAL? Life is the maze, I am just a traveler Ambiguous ab

Life has its strange ways…more strange are the people you meet…stranger still is how  your relationship with each of them eventually turns out to be. There are these people whose first impression in your mind is not what you would call appealing. Often they are the ones to prove you wrong. They seem nice when you actually understand them without being prejudiced. Hey! Who says first impression is the last impression…this aint no interview…right? Certain people just become close to you without your conscious effort. You can speak your heart out or throw a tantrum or just hang out with them. Here, there is no hesitation or thinking twice. You know they are just ready to listen without judging, all cause they know you well enough to care. Some just know your name, while others are the –“hai, how are you, am good, bye” type. What they think about you is not something you ll probably know, not that it matters anyway. There are also ones you have good laugh with and joke around

Yeah! That is quite an interesting name for a blog.So as you would have presumed and rightly i am a teenager.My name is Charishma, am seventeen.This is my first blog and i want it to be....well i am not sure, really. If one day...i come back to where it all began...i want this post to stir those hearty memories. Reminiscence...yes,that's what am talking about. :) 15/5/2014 6:15 pm...that's the date and time here in Bangalore,India. Am just sitting here in my bedroom typing this; in the meanwhile some where a new born is taking its first breath, a parent is smiling at his/her child taking the first step, some poor soul is begging with desperation, a rich guy is enjoying his beer, an old man is edging towards the end of his days, a terrorist prepares for a kill , a soldier is guarding the borders, gazing intently at the horizon,a desolated human is thinking of ending life, someone is laughing over a long forgotten joke, someone is crying over a long lost mate...amusin